Monday, February 15, 2010

My Name is Khan

Going by the number of five and five and a half stars the film has got from honorable reviewers, let me clarify before I start. My name is Blogeswari and I have not been paid to write this review.
My name is Kaaviyam
The Kaaviyam is about Rizvan Khan played by Saaruk kaan suffering from Asperger's Syndrome 'coz of which he has a problem with social interaction, hates the color yellow and stays away from noise and crowd. He lives with Ammi Zarina Wahab does some craft-giri at home when she is not drawing stick figures explaining Unity across religions, to her son . Rizzzu moves to US with brother Jimmy Shergill and bhabhi Soniya Jehan. He falls in love to hairstylist , single mom Mandira (Gajol). Rizzu and Mandira get married and after a tragic incident you find Mandira screaming at Rizzu to go and tell the President of the United States of America "My name is Khan and am not a terrorist". Off goes Rizzu with his saaku-moottai roaming all over the country looking for the President to utter those golden words.
My name is M.G.R
Rizzu suddenly becomes MGR in Buddhan Yesu Gandhi pirandadu song and saves people from the hurricane, in the climax. Karaj Jogar in a bid to take his film to the International level brings in yet another Forrest Gump moment - a fat Mama Jenny and her scary hair son. Totally absurd this one is. Neither you nor Jogar has any idea on why the characters suddenly pop up on screen singing "Hum honge kaaaaamyaaaab" in Englipees.
My name is Saroja Devi
With MGR around, can Saroja Devi be far behind?
Please, someone explain why Rizzu keeps his hands like Saroja Devi and runs around, throughout the film?
My name is Khhhhashtakaalame
Please note, it is not Kashtakaalam but (from the epiglotis) Khhashtakaalam... Khaashtakaalam.. Everybody, not just Saaruk but everybody including the security officers at the airport overact.. ..over react. The interrogation scene where Rizzu is questioned in a cell by the officer reminds you of Gowravam Sivaji Ganesan interrogating Major Sundarrajan.
My name is Kaanamal Ponavargal
Talented actors like Arif Zackaria, Vinay Pathak, Sumeet Raghavan do tundu beedi roles. You blink and you will miss them. And which terrorist discusses plan out in the open I want to know...so fake I tell you!
My name is Kattthal Koochal
Kajol is straight out of her Punjabu mummy avtar in Kappi Kushi Kappi Gum (K3G)... screams and shouts and makes you think Kirron Kher is deivam compared to her. Her make up is terrible and her acting (barring the one where she cries for her son) worse.
My name is Akka Dutt
You can't stand her torture on NDTV, on twitter... you run out of the house only to find her following you to the theatre.. She does one emosional news bit. Ayyo!
My name is Superstar
Obama and gumbal in out of focus do a 'Baasha Superstar walk' towards Saaruk and gang. Soooper!
My name is Kooppadu

Ok, this film has an Islamic background. But why does each and every song sound very Rahat Fateh Ali Khan- Shafqat Aman Ali –ish. The songs start straight with a koopaadu… Nooreeeeeeekhudaaaaaaaaaaa…. Sajdaaaaaaaaa (a sound-alike of the beautiful Iktara)...etc?

My name is yawn 
Are you on of those whose facebook page is filled with status messages like “ I lrnt a lot fm MNIK…", “Sharuk rocks!” ‘Spread love n peace! Kjo is the best!” “Humanity is humane… We are all one world” etc? Beware!! Don't trust these messages. Don't waste your time, money and energy watching S-I-C-K... i mean M-N-I-K! (rendum onnudan)
Saaruk-ji - Jogarji - please rename your film as
My name is Kodumai - 1 out of 5. Stay out of the theaters !

69 Responses:

Nat Sriram said...

LOL-ed on the Major Sundarrajan reference :)
Thx for saving 10$, My name is Escape..

ராமகுமரன் said...

good post, also please put a english translation behind each tamil words like kathal koochal etc, others will b able to appreciate it fully

Lavanya said...

My name is Khan paththilaam theriyaadhu but your name is Kaamedy :D

Anonymous said...

Oho. My name is gone case pola. Ok. But one suggestion. I urge you to rate movies unlike those cadbury people and do this instead
1 - dont waste bandwidth
2 - watch on youtube (part 1 of 17..)
3 - download torrent/xvid
4 - wait for TV release
5 - watch in theatre
Thanks and Regards

Jayaprakash Sampath said...

soooopperrrrrr!

Chandni said...

Romba soopar post!!

My name is naan said...

I am naan on a mission to clear the name of naan. I have been falsely implicated as an elite food item by the chapatti conspiracy. But I am just a humble naan. Support me in my heroic quest to meet Obama and clear the name of naans everywhere.

Iris said...

ur name is blogeshwari and this review rocks....v true...was cringing in my seat in most scenes......hammin hammin hammin left right n center

Magnus said...

My name is Raj Thackeray and I'm in love with you. Will you marry me?

Hilarious post, btw. And oh, you misspelled Karan Jogar as "Karaj Jogar". That's a big insult to the gay community.

tarnishoar said...

MNIK was a mega-serial. And what's with the 'Nai-nai-Naina' theme all throughout the flick, a trademark of Vikraman.

Vishal said...

Hilarious! (Although many of the regional references went beyond me.)

BTW, since when did Sumeet Raghavan become a talented actor? Did I miss a movie or two? (Or am I missing the joke here?!)

Unknown said...

Interesting, and funny review. Does anyone agree that the film stereotypes African Americans?

http://www.the-nri.com/index.php/2010/02/film-review-my-name-is-khan/

Rahul said...

My name is roughlolu. Whatu patients to write review.

My name is kkkhhhh-THU said...

Can't agree more :). I still can't believe i wasted 10 bucks on this that too on a Sunday night. The whole movie was such a fake and I don't know why there are any positives reviews for this movie in the first place. These days everyone wants to take movies about terrorism and are desperately trying to send some message across with such movies (as though they are trying to save the world or something). One thing they need to realize is that they are not accomplishing even one bit...

Great review Blogeswari!!

Arun said...

Yes! Yes! You have taken the revenge!

Anonymous said...

LOL Blogeswari ! you are my one stop shop for movie reviews you know!

in my household it is like "Sorry family Blogeswari says dont see means dont see'

Keep up the humanitarian relief efforts!

slooze said...

enna kodumai saaruk thy name EKSTN instead of MNIK

Anonymous said...

never liked karan johar's movies.
how can this hindi vikraman considered as a good dir.

RRSLM said...

Soooperrrrrrrrrr...........

Anonymous said...

funniest review ever! keep them coming..and loved all the old digs at tamil films which we rarely see! thanks.

melbournemangai said...

Appada..danks Blogeswari..saved our $20. May be it is not even worth 3 movies for $5 DVD!!!

subu.ps said...

wow fantastically expressed. and thanks for saving my money toooo !!!

Harini said...

I laughed like crazy after reading your review. My friend told me I will hate the movie from the depth of my heart and now after reading your review am damn sure about it.

You are the best for reviews blogeshwari...btw Aayirathil Oruvan review please...I get very mixed reviews

Anonymous said...

Ahaa the comparison with Saroja devi - konnuteenga ponga

Mumbai Paused said...

ROTFL at Soroja Devi connection!

Unknown said...

Blogeswari, I can't wait for your review on "Tamizh Padam'

kaaju katli said...

ha ha ha ha ha ROTFLMAO!!!

Hema said...

Thank God the film was released because I could de-stress myself with a review like this...No, I have no intention of watching an SRK film anyway! I knew the hype (only) would carry it through and your review says it all! ROFL:)))

yarn_lady said...

Loved your review! have no intentions of watching any bollywood movie !!!Thanks for the Laugh!

Anonymous said...

Hi, First timer here. Got it in my shared feed and absolutely loved it.

Very well written post, funny and yet helped me to realise how to stop the kashta kaalam from coming near me - Escape out of MNIK !!!

Pavals said...

theater pakkam poi sontha selavula sooniyam vachukittu, appuram vanthu intha post parkka vendi irukku.. nimitham :(

sindhu said...

haha...good one!

WhatsInAName said...

Ha ha ha
My name is sirippazhagi after reading this review. Loved the comparison to saro mami and sunderrajan mama.
Ha ha ha ha

Ramya said...

LOL! My name is ramya and i like ur review. :)

Teesu (very very Indian, very very good) said...

Besht reviews are unpaid for.:-)

Anoop said...

LOVE IT! great review.

Immobile Mini Supertramp said...

I hate Saarook and Karaj Jogar...they are modern time Sivaji Ganesan! However, could never express myself like you did!!! Awesome review 'Blogeswari Kameswari'!!

ATT said...

I paid 100 bugs at fame nasik rd. was happy it wasnt like 250 i spent on 3i or ishqiya... Thankfully kiron kher wasnt there in the movie, we had that actress of 'tara' serial fame instead. Movie story could have been treatment to get better product, but then its bollywood-jai ho.

Kaarthik said...

Hi Blogeswari, I'm an ardent follower of ur blog. I never expected such a harsh review for MNIK. Seems that you want to seek attention by giving an extremely opposite review. Y dont u accept such concepts? I don't refer to u. Generally our ppl don't accept (can't digest) if a person from our country does some excellent work. But they rave about a mediocre Hollywood flick. Definitely this is the Best work of Karan and SRK, though not Kajol. Both of them has matured a lot from their regular candy-floss romance. U have given a very good review for Love Aajkal which is a very average flick and cant be compared to MNIK's standard. Even those who dont like SRK & Karan would love this movie. Pls look the movie as a movie and dont compare with reality.
-My Name is Kaarthik.

P.S: I love the Saroja Devi's comparison though.

Kaarthik said...

Hi Blogeswari, I'm an ardent follower of ur blog. I never expected such a harsh review for MNIK. Seems that you want to seek attention by giving an extremely opposite review. Y dont u accept such concepts? I don't refer to u. Generally our ppl don't accept (can't digest) if a person from our country does some excellent work. But they rave about a mediocre Hollywood flick. Definitely this is the Best work of Karan and SRK, though not Kajol. Both of them has matured a lot from their regular candy-floss romance. U have given a very good review for Love Aajkal which is a very average flick and cant be compared to MNIK's standard. Even those who dont like SRK & Karan would love this movie. Pls look the movie as a movie and dont compare with reality.

P.S: I love the Saroja Devi's comparison though.

ஞானப்பழம் said...

I dunno why.. but i kept reading 'saaruk' as 'sarakku' everytime..

sudha said...

my fb status was - my name is karaj jogar and i am a loosu!

Meera said...

SRK's airport detention in US & Shiv Sena opposition... all these publicity stunts for My Name is Kodumai??? Nonsense... They are the stalwarts of our cinema.. dint u see them upholding the coutry's name in Mile Sur Bhajan? How can i u review the historic landmark film like this???
Btw i loved ur review :):)

Trendsetters said...

I love your articles...

iyer said...

Love your blog. I haven't watched the movie and now, never will.

http://blog.photosbysri.com

www.photosbysri.com

Srinivas Iyer
Chi Ka Ko

Abi said...

I am sure I have mentioned this before- thalavi unga blogu kalakkal ponga!! LOVE it Love it Love it!

Anonymous said...

Poor Saroja Devi!

Momo's Ma said...

chance e illa...too good. i always knew the film would be an ultra bore,cos of all the hype, hence didnt rush to see FDFS. now, after this dhulai , i am just gonna sit at home and wait to watch it on cable/ tv etc cos am sure it will come in star plus /colors in the next few months.

Anonymous said...

I would like to pay you for this! :P

Anonymous said...

hi blogeswari... am a first-timer here... loved ur blog... wish you would review rann too... i wanted to stand up and scream in the theatre... am so glad i dint fall into the trap of watching MNIK...

Sonali said...

Hi, M a first timer but trust me after reading this i was wondering why m i a first timer here. This is fantabulous!!! I was neways in no mood to watch MNIK and after reading this i won't even let any of my friends watch it...
U r amazing!!

Anonymous said...

Appadi podu arivale. Awesome. You should have been the film critic for ibnlive. IBNLive rated 3.5 stars for MNIK.

ram said...

La la lala la la lala la la lala la.....

Venkat said...

sooper.. soooper ma... but I am afraid KJoker and saaruk wont be able to enjoy the tamil references..

Anonymous said...

you are a bullshit blogger...first learn to blog thn write a post!tc and DIE!

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Anonymous said...

naaan namba maattaen. You have been employed by the Amircan, AcshunKumar camp to berate such a nice wonderful touching moovie....itha ipdi saavadichuttiyeee maaaaaa.

had fun, keep it going.

Blogs.v.thar

CampaAIgn said...

my name is shivam and this post was so hilarious i just fell of my chair especially ruk ruk khan running like saroja devi.

Sameer said...

Well...I loved MNIK ...and I thought SRK-Kajol were amazing...but thats ur point of view..u can say wat evr u feel

nidhi said...

Hey dear... very nice post hilarious one .. but don' force your personal opinion on others... its too much yaar ...Movie wasn't that bad ... depends on, by what feelings, YOU went to watch movie ... that doesn't mean movie wasn't worth... although senseless at some places... movie ain't that bad .... Cheers Girl !

faisal said...

i guess ur not paid for writing for mnik/bdutt but u seems to b paid to write against it....btw gud shit:P

Nikesh Rathi said...

My name is (s.r.)khan and i don't overact !!!!

Swastee Ranjan said...

i have a thing about journalists, you dont want to do' the good thing' ever, what is wrong with a movie that teaches simple thing....whats wrong with a movie that differentiates, please if its melodramatic, go tell me which hollywood a-listed movie isnt. Damn' you have taken money but from the wrong camp sweety. Sincerely advising you, stay where you are, do what you do, and you will be no where. actually no wonder, i dont know who you are.

naamnei said...

awesomely honest. tweeted 2 srk n kjo. cudn't catch d regional anectodes tho. if pssbl, pls elaborate.

sumit kumar said...

totally idiotic! some people live withim themselves without seeing the world outside. u r one of them!!

Anonymous said...

good one. pls review other movies too., u have been slow/busy since december and thats not acceptable to me. i rely on your reviews, so pls , even if u dont have the time to type a detailed one, pls type bullets atleast.

Anil Sawan said...

this is awesome!! m sharing this link in twiter and fb!!

Anonymous said...

Utterly Biased review ever read !!! Wonder how your movies would be if you ever got into Direction !!

Priyadarshini said...

this shows how regionally biased u can get!!!!!!!!!!! Dhuh